On October 21, singer-songwriter Elliott Smith killedhimself.
When I first heard the news, I tried telling my roommate andfriends in the neighboring rooms. They'd never heard of him.
So I popped in my "Good Will Hunting" DVD and played the musicvideo for "Miss Misery," the song that propelled him to mainstreamfame when it was nominated for an Oscar. More recently "The RoyalTenenbaums" featured his song "Needle in the Hay" during a scene ofa character's suicide attempt.
Needless to say, I've been listening to his albums a fair amountlately. He had five: Roman Candle (1994), Elliott Smith (1995),Either/Or (1998), XO (1998), and Figure 8 (2000). And wow, I'm justreminded how much Smith was the genuine article. Right from thebeginning he was capable of nailing it on all fronts with intimatelyrics, tender melodies, and a distinct, gentle voice. All theelements would come together to form immediately engaging,accessible music. It's just so easy to get lost in him. I sure hopethey release From a Basement on the Hill, the album he was workingon when he died.
Go and pick up one of his CDs now. Or download one of his songs.(Smith favored file sharing: "I like the idea. Sure, people shouldbe able to trade musically with each other.")
There's a strong temptation now to go off on some tangent aboutsuicide; perhaps the ignorant tendency to associate and romanticizedepression with artistry, or maybe the necessity of forgetting thesuicide and focusing on the art. And while I understand the valueof analyzing tragedies -- there's much to be learned -- part of mefeels like it's wrong to take somebody's death as an opportunity topontificate. So that's all I'm going to say about that. If Iexplored this anymore, you'd be able to smell my hypocrisy waftingoff the page. Back to Smith.
So I'm online searching for quotes from Smith as I'm writing,and I'm seriously thinking about just dumping this topic and tryingsomething else. (For obvious reasons, it's been a tough one.) I'mlistening to my Elliott Smith MP3s as I read a Rolling Stonearticle from November of 2000: "It's testament to the flexibilityof his songcraft that earlier acoustic tunes like 'Needle in theHay'..." when all of a sudden just as I read the song title "Needlein the Hay" that very song starts playing on my computer.
I freeze. I swear I'm not making this up. Totally alone in myroom, I glance around in terror. I so wish I could dismiss thingsas coincidences. I'm not one to believe in ghosts or spirits, andI'm not saying I do now. It's just too eerie for me to handle. Forsome reason I'm too afraid to turn off the music, too afraid to getup and do something else. It's like Smith has pinned me to my seat.Feel free to dismiss my experience. I'd like to.
A prophecy descends upon me. Someone needs this music now. Smithneeds to reach someone. Maybe someone's on the edge, depressed,stressed, suicidal, angry or nihilistic. Maybe someone can besaved. Maybe someone's life can be made better by listening to afew of his beautiful songs.
Maybe all of our lives can.
Write to David at swimminginbrokenglass@yahoo.com
visit http://www.bsu.edu/web/dmswindle
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